A huge thank you..

Before I start getting back into my "normal" posts, I'd like to thank you all for your amazing comments on my last post. I didn't expect to receive so many responses, especially such detailed, sincere and heartfelt messages.

You have all made me so incredibly happy. It's so comforting to know that some of you consider me a friend, even if we've never spoken to one another and actually care enough about me to leave such kind words. It just amazes me how many great people there are out there and I feel so fortunate to be able to connect to some of you and share my life with you. You are all amazing - thank you for being there for me and for giving me strength and motivation to do what I love.

-Natty

A piece of me died with you, Dad...

Hey Everyone,

I'm really sorry for the lack of updates. It's been a month, and I haven't mentioned why, or what was the reason behind my hiatus. Although I really wanted to share with you all what I've been feeling, I've been putting off this post day after day. Mainly because talking about it tosses me into the reality of it, which I still can't believe it yet. Also, I've been unsure of how deep I should really go when talking about it. It's really hard for me not to go deep, because it's something that is so immersed in my soul.

READ MORE TO CONTINUE READING...

October 2nd, my Dad passed away. **I started writing the detailed story, but I think it's too detailed and maybe too personal to be posted. My hands are shaking as I type, so I'm just going to try making this part brief.** His death was something very unexpected. As far as we all knew, he was in good health and never suffered from any illnesses other than a common cold - even those were very rare because my Dad was a very tough man. Sunday morning/afternoon was a normal day at home. We carried out our normal duties, and my mother and me ran to the store for a little over an hour, and came back and found my Dad laying on the ground with no pulse. I called an ambulance as my brother tried to revive him, nothing happened. The paramedics came, and as hope filled in our hearts that he was going to be okay - they gave us all the worst words possible "I'm sorry.. but he's gone. There is nothing we can do." You can imagine how I felt. I fell to my knees along side my Dad in shock, disbelief, horror, confusion and completely heart-broken. How can this be??? He was fine a couple hours ago. He was laughing, smiling, cooking.. we were about to have a barbecue. My Dad didn't have a second chance and he was all alone when he had his last breath, which is the worse thing to swallow. I sat next to him, holding his hand for what seemed like hours until I was pulled away from him.

I'm not sure why, but my biggest fear in life was losing my parents. I was, and still am, scared of nothing but that. It was a fear that consumed me every day. It was always more-so my Dad than my Mom, because I saw my Dad getting older faster. It was something that became really hard on me, as I'm sure it is to anyone who sees their parents aging. For a normal person, you may think about it once in a while that your parents aren't going to be here some day, but for me, I thought about it several times a day - each day. Every time I looked at my Dad, my heart always weakened. My Dad and I had a very special bond, and although it wasn't always expressed verbally, we had a closeness deep in our hearts that no one could ever replace. My biggest nightmare was to ever lose my Dad before I spent the time I wanted to with him and learn about his life, his struggles, his deepest thoughts and emotions. I suppose no time is really "enough" time, but I wanted to hear about him from his own mouth, not from others.. because only my Dad knew himself best.

My biggest fear and nightmare came true on October 2nd. I never thought that God would take my Dad as soon as he did. My Dad died almost instantly from a massive heart attack, something that could of been prevented with routine check-ups.

It has been really hard on my family, as my Dad was the "rock" and the foundation of our family. He went above and beyond his whole life to provide for us and make sure we were always happy. I'm not saying this because it's my Dad, but I've never seen another Dad in my whole life do as much for their family as my Dad did - even on his last day of life.

My brother and me before the wake. It hurt him too much to be inside the house, and I tried to comfort him. We had a really deep conversation, and to me, these pictures are worth a million words. I see a lot of pain when I look at these photos.. like two children - lost souls in a big world without their Dad.

I've been able to get through my biggest fear by surrounding myself with the people that love me - staying very close to my Mom and brother, keeping myself busy, and having lots of faith. I know it may sound cliche, but when you want to comfort someone who lost a loved one, you'd usually say something like "they'll always be with you, they'll always be by your side." I wonder if those people really know the truth in that. I didn't know the truth in that until I lost my Dad. I know my Dad is still here. If he wasn't here, I wouldn't be able to be as strong as I am. But he is here comforting my family and me, and letting us know that he's okay and he loves us. I believe in signs from the spirits and I believe I've noticed several that were all from him. I ask him to visit me in my dreams, and sometimes he does...

My Dad and Me last October on vacation

I can easily curl up in a ball and lock myself in my room for weeks at a time, but for my family, myself and my Dad, I'm trying to be as strong as I can. I'm going to stay motivated and continue on with my life and doing the things I love - which of course, include blogging. I'm going to try stressing less and loving more.

From this whole experience, I've realized many things.
1) Life is short. You don't really understand how short it is until you lose someone you love.
2) You can't be prepared for death. You will never be prepared. The only thing you can do to prepare yourself is love the ones around you and don't "put-off" spending time with your loved ones for a rainy day. Love your loved ones every day.
3) Don't be selfish. Being selfish isn't good for your inner spirit. In order for your spirit to grow and to be happy from within, you can't be selfish.
4) Don't talk bad about others. If the people around you are talking negative about another person, be the one to change their thinking (to each their own?) or don't comment on the matter.
5) Don't hold grudges. What's the point?
6) Surround yourself with positive energy. Positive energy will motivate you. Negative energy will only bring you down.
7) Love everybody. Yep, everybody. This ties into #4 Don't talk bad about others. It's not right to judge another person for their beliefs, the way they were raised, their personality, the things they like, etc. Everyone is different and you have to be accepting of others. Once you accept others as they are, you'll feel such happiness from within. You are no better than anyone else. Having more money doesn't make you "better".
8) Always appreciate what others do for you. Don't expect anything from anyone ever and you won't be disappointed. When you're not expecting anything, that's when you're really thankful.
9) You were born as dust and you will leave as dust. You won't leave with your money or your expensive things. You can have expensive things, but you have to remain humble. Money isn't everything and vanity isn't everything.
10) Always be optimistic. Never give up, or lose hope. There are open doors for all of us in life.
11) Always attend a funeral/wake if you're able to. It means a lot to the family. I know it may not be an environment you like, because death is something that scares all of us, but I know how comforting it really is to have lots of people around you.
12) When someone you love dies, they are only gone physically. You can talk to them out loud any time you want, and they will listen to you.
13) You will have some days that are good and some that are bad. You can't be strong all of the time, and that is fine.
14) Be happy for what you have, and don't be bitter for what you don't have.
15) Don't be afraid of going to the doctor for a routine check-up.

There are so many things I can list, but those are just some of things that came into my head as I was typing.

I want to thank you all who left me beautiful messages on makeupalley, twitter and the mail. All of your prayers, wishes and kind words were are are so much appreciated. Thank you so, so much.

For those of you who lost a loved one, I feel for you deeply, and I hope you will keep your head up and remain positive through it all. Just know, when you're happy, your loved one is too.

Four roses from my Dad's funeral arrangement that stands for the four members of our family placed on the spot he died.  One is white, because he is an angel now. 

 

Luther Vandross - Dance with my Father 

This song is beautiful. If you have a minute, listen to it... 

My new hair color + a couple photos of Rocky :)

I ended up dying my hair last night with the hair dye I posted about yesterday. It was the Clairol Nice n' Easy Colorblend Foam in the shade #4 Dark Brown. Prior to dying my hair, my hair color was an ashy, medium brown with a bunch of golden brown-auburn tones towards the bottom. This dye changed my color to a very dark, rich brown. I really like it, and I'm hoping it's not going to fade considerably once I wash my hair. 

READ MORE..

As for the dye, I don't think I'd purchase it again. I thought the idea of using a foam was kinda cool, but I actually find it a little inconvenient to use - especially when using a brush to coat the roots. Also another inconvenience, by the looks of the container, it looks like a pump - but it's not. You have to squeeze the bottle for the foam to dispense. Not a big deal, but it's a little awkward. I waited the full 25 minutes, conditioned and rinsed. It left my hair feeling really dry. I could barely get a brush through my hair. On the plus side, it seemed to take well to my gray hairs, and the color looks great. I'll just have to make sure to load up on the deep conditioners. I'm almost done with my Aussie Deep Conditioner. I think I might pick up the "It's a 10" Miracle Leave in Conditioner. I saw it today at ULTA in a pink bottle for Breast Cancer Awareness. (For more info, click here) Anyone recommend it?

Face:

Reviva Labs Makeup Primer

MAC Select Moisturecover Concealer in NW20

MAC Pro Longwear Foundation in NC40 mixed with Revlon Age Defying with DNA Advantage in #10 Bare Buff to lighten

MAC Magically Cool Liquid Powder in Honey Rose (highlight/blush, applied to cheeks and nose)

MAC Sculpt (to contour cheeks)

MAC Smooth Harmony Beauty Powder (bronzer, applied along cheeks and forehead)

Guerlain Meteorites in Mythic (setting powder)

Bare Escentuals Well Rested mixed with Ben Nye Neutral Set Powder (to set concealer)

Brows:

Maybelline Define-a-Brow in Medium Brown

Maybelline Great Lash CLEAR Mascara (to set brows)

Eyes:

MAC Rubenesque Paint Pot (applied all over lid as a base)

MAC Melon Pigment (applied all over the lid, on top of Rubenesque)

MAC Constructivist Paint Pot (smudged across upper and lower lashline and smoked out) - LOVE!

Shiseido Mascara Base

Maybelline The Falsie's Mascara

Lips:

MAC Subculture Lip Liner

Milani Rosehip Lipstick

MAC Clear Lipglass

I bought this cute little Halloween pajama for Rocky a few days ago at Target. He looks so adorable, but he is always so full of energy, I could not get a decent picture of him. The first picture was the best I could do for now. lol

He looks like Alfalfa.

And, here he is being his typical watch dog self. I was outside on the patio trying to get his attention, but he kept ignoring me. Typical guy.

Talk to you all soon!

A post full of random-ness. My gray hair, The new Revlon foundation, Etc.

(Image Source)

Okay, the image at the bottom is completely random (well, more random than the first one - kinda?!) but I thought it was totally cute.

Anyway, what that arrow pointing to is, one crazy strand of gray (snow white, actually) hair, trying to steal the show today. haha!

One thing that I always put off is dying my hair. I really don't like dying my hair. It's a pure nuisance to me. But, it seems these days I can't get away with not dying my hair for months at a time like I use to, or I'll have a ton of these little grays shining through my bangs. Honestly, it really isn't a big deal and I'm not really freaking out about it - just really surprised!

READ MORE..

I think I saw my first gray at 19, then I had around three at 20-21. In the past two years now, it seems that every time I do my hair, I'm finding more and more. I'm not at all going to be surprised if I'm completely gray by 30.

I guess the upside is, more trips to the salon! :)

In the mean time, boxed hair dye is my BFF. I like trying new ones all of the time, and I'm hoping to step out of my comfort zone sometime soon to try different colors (some of you may know, I've been wanting to try red for months). For now, I got a box of this "foam" dye from Clairol. I might do it tonight if I'm up to it, but when I do, I'll be sure to let you all know how well it works!

Last week I stopped in CVS and picked up the new Revlon Age Defying DNA Advantage Foundation because I had a really awesome coupon. It's regularly $14.99, and it was on sale for $10 with $2 Back in Extra Cash. Then, I had a $5 coupon from this past Sunday's insert, which basically made the foundation $3. On top of that, I used Extra Cash I had from earlier in the week to pay for it, and ending up paying nothing. I love deals like that!

What did stink though, was they were out of most of the shades and it was after 10PM on the last day of the sale, and I was at the only 24 hour CVS in my neighborhood. I didn't want to miss out completely though, so I picked up a shade that is too light on it's own, but it will be useful to mix with some of my other foundations that are too dark. I use self tanner all year round, so I always keep a really light shade on hand for mixing.

I ended up getting #10 Bare Buff, which is the 2nd to lightest foundation. The lightest shade had a slight pink tone, whereas the 2nd appeared more yellow/beige.

Revlon DNA Advantage #10 Bare Buff

I've used it a few times now for mixing and I really like the consistency of it. It's super silky and creamy and has a really radiant finish. I can't really state my thoughts about it overall because I haven't worn it alone, but I will try it sometime soon when I have little to no tan.

Here's a comparison to the foundation I typically use for lightening my foundations. It's actually almost empty, because I use really often. Definitely recommend using Neutrogena Healthy Skin for that purpose.

On another note, thought I'd throw in this completely random tidbit. While doing some heavy duty cleaning and getting rid of a lot of my old things, I came across this dainty, sterling silver cross ring. I had almost tossed it away on accident. I remember I purchased it at a garage sale when I was probably around 7 or 8 years old. I probably paid a quarter for it. I know I haven't worn it in over ten years, but I shined it up and it's as good as new. I've been wearing it all week and I just think it's so cute. I like how the cross dangles around. It gives me something to fidget with during the day. It also reminds me of my childhood and how almost every day in the summer for years my Mom and I would stop at every garage sale and find some really neat things. By the age of 7, I was already an expert identifying different types of glass, and if an item was antique or not. I had a real knack for vintage jewelry and porcelain knick knacks. My favorite were owls, I have no idea why.

Lastly, what is up with the weather lately in Chicago!? I couldn't wait for summer to be over, and now that summer is over, it has been gloomy, cloudy and rainy every day. Not cool. Not cool at all. 

Target parking lot rainbow.. woop woop!

Hope you all have a wonderful weekend! I'll have a real post for you guys tomorrow. haha

P.S. I'm totally aware I've been wearing the same jacket all week. It's not cold enough out for a real jacket, and I like that this one has a hood for when it rains. ;)

First Impressions + partial review: Laura Mercier Tinted Moisturizer!

Some of you maybe remembered, last week I stopped in at Sephora on the search for a tinted moisturizer. I've never used one prior, but my curiosity got the best of me, and I picked up a sample of Laura Mercier's Oil-Free Tinted Moisturizer. (original post here)

Laura Mercier makes two formulations of the tinted moisturizers, one containing oil and one that is oil free. Both formulations have the same shade range and same SPF (20). I wasn't sure which one to choose, but when I told the Sephora Sales Associate that I have sensitive/prone to breakouts skin, she recommended I try the oil free version. I was matched to the shade "Sand".

PRODUCT DESCRIPTION:

Oil Free Formula - This lightweight foundation that can be reapplied as necessary, offers sun protection for sensitive or acne prone skin, oil control, and provides hydration to prevent dryness.

Regular Formula - Laura Mercier Tinted Moisturizer is a sheer, lightweight formula with a hint of color you can use in place of foundation for a natural finish and a healthy glowing complexion. It contains a SPF 20 for the ultimate in anti-aging prevention.

(The oil free formula is described as a foundation, and the regular formula rather calls it a "formula" that can be used in place of a foundation. I'm guessing because the regular version acts as more of a moisturizer with a tint and with the oil free version, it's more of a "tint" that doesn't give off added moisture.)

Aside from the tinted moisturizer, I was given a sample of the oil free primer. Every time I've used the tinted moisturizer, I've always used the primer beforehand. The first time using this, I attempted to apply the tinted moisturizer with my fingers. That doesn't work too well. I was really surprised that the texture is rather thick and doesn't spread evenly. I resorted to using my Sigma F80 Flat Top Foundation brush, and it worked out much better. So I basically apply it the same way I would any foundation. Dot it all over my face and blend with my brush. Because it's sheer, I'll use a little more product than I'd normally wear with a heavier foundation. The tube is 1.7 oz, compared to most foundations weighing in at 1 oz, so you can afford to use a little more. On my normal skin, (not oily or dry, a little shine in the t-zone) the finish is a satin - light dewy (not greasy) finish. Most of the reviews I've read for this said it has a very dewy, even an oily finish. I didn't experience that. I do have to set with powder though, because it seems to highlight the pores on my cheeks and add shine to my nose and chin. It instantly transforms when I apply my Guerlain Meteorites (my setting powder) and buff it into my skin with a kabuki. The finish is absolutely gorgeous. It looks incredibly natural and completely undetectable on my face. It looks like I may of using a dusting of a very fine milled powder, but that's all. It lasts well through an 8 hour day with little fading by the time I wash my face.

KEY POINTS

- This works really well with the oil-free primer. An oil-free primer or moisturizer would be the best choice as a base to keep the foundation from slipping. 

- Because the formula/texture isn't very emollient, it's a must priming or moisturizing the skin beforehand in order for the foundation to smooth out well - Especially for those with dry skin.

- The coverage is light. It will even out the complexion and add color to your skin. It is buildable, but blemishes will need an extra concealer if you want them completely covered. 

- Should be set with a dusting of setting powder.

Here's a little comparison for color reference. Sand may look really dark (even darker than MAC Studio Fix Fluid NC40! But, less yellow) when swatched, but it sheers out nicely. It's a good match for skintones from NC30-NC40. I usually stick around NC25-30 these days and oddly, it looks better when I don't use self tanner on my face. When I have self tanner on and use the tinted moisturizer, my face looks too dark. Strange?

I snapped a couple of photos last week wearing it, I was probably around NC25-30. (wow, i look pale!) I didn't wear any bronzer or blush, just MAC's Magically Cool Liquid Powder in Honey Rose on my cheeks for a little bit of a peachy glow.

Although I do like it, I'd like to test out the regular formula (as many prefer it over the oil free) and go from there. I may pick up another shade of the oil free because I think Sand looks a little orange at times, or try Bobbi Brown as I know she specializes in yellow toned foundations.

Hope you're all having an awesome day!

Jewelmint Ever Frost Ring Review with Lots of Photos!

Jewelmint Ever Frost Ring

ITEM DESCRIPTION: Alpine trend alert! Get lost in a winter wonderland with this sleek design. Our 1� wide geometric ring boats pave crystal icing and pearly white enamel. Pulling off this piece yearlong is easy with its glowing 14k gold-plated sides. Give your closet a fresh spin, and live out your Snow White fantasy in the most modern way.

I can't really say all of the Jewelmint pieces are "me", but I'll usually find at least one piece a month that I really like. This month the only others I liked were the Western Dream Earrings, Lunar Blue Necklace and Silver Zip Bracelet. I've liked the Silver Zip Bracelet for a while now, and I feel like I'll regret not eventually getting it. I guess I'm just waiting for a good coupon code to come along (a really good coupon code).

I liked the Ever Frost Ring a lot in the photos, and I'm really happy with my choice. I love mixing metals and the fact that it's silver, gold and white, it's very versatile. I've been wearing it with both silver, gold and rose gold and it always matches great. I really like the way it looks on the same hand with my Rose Gold watch combined with a silver bracelet. It's really trendy, edgy and is definitely a statement ring. 

It seems very well crafted, and although it may look really heavy, it's actually pretty lightweight. My ring finger is a 6, but since I didn't know how the sizing would run, to be safe, I figured I'd order a 7. I'd most likely wear it on pointer finger or middle finger anyway. Well, I got the 7 and it falls right off my ring finger but fits fine on my pointer and middle finger - it's not very snug on either, so I believe it runs slightly large, if anything.

Did you order anything this month?

If you haven't heard of Jewelmint, check it out HERE. There are so many coupon codes out that it's hard to keep track of them all, but the best codes are always for first time purchases.

The best code I found for New Members/First Purchase is 60% OFF Your first piece with code: EXITPOP60. It's not stated when it expires (it may be 9/30). It will bring the $29.99 price tag down to $11.99 AND you get free shipping. Awesome deal.

For Existing Members, the best I've found is $8 OFF your next purchase with code: AEREE. You'll end up paying $21.99 with free shipping, which isn't too bad depending on the item you choose (some seem more worth it than others).

Happy Shopping!

Things I've been loving lately + FOTD!

1) Clarins Vital Light Serum - This is probably the best smelling serum I've ever owned. I've been using this for the past couple of weeks and my skin has been looking fabulous. I will have a full review to come soon, but so far, I'm obsessed with it. 

2) Dr. Brandt Dark Circles Away� Collagen Eye Serum - I got a couple samples of this from Sephora and I've been using it every night. I really do see a reduction in my dark circles (temporary, of course) and it moisturizes really well. I'd love to purchase it, but at $55 for a 1/2 oz... errr, I doubt it. Hopefully I can grab some more samples.

3) Anastasia Clear Brow Gel  - Now that my brows are so thick, a brow gel is very necessary. Even though I love my MAC Brow Set for tinting my brows, it doesn't hold my un-ruly brows in place all day. So, I've been using a mini version of the Anastasia Brow Gel that came with a kit of mine and it's worked the best for me so far! I'll be purchasing a full-size once I go to ULTA. 

4) MAC Paint Pots I've been loving my MAC Paint Pots lately and for the past month, it's all I've been wearing on my eyes. They're easy and they last. I want more!

5) MAC 181SE Kabuki Brush - I got this in a recent swap and I've been using it every say for setting powder. It's a perfect brush to keep in my bad for touch ups. I'm going to try finding a back-up or two.. ;)

6) Real Techniques Blush Brush - This has become my favorite brush for applying blush. Everything about the brush is perfect. It's soft, the shape is perfect and it applies & blends my blush really well. 

7) Physician's Formula Eye Booster Eyeliner in Ultra-Black - I got this liner on a whim, and I'm so happy I did. I can confidently say this is my favorite liquid liner pen of all time. The tip is amazing and it makes applying eyeliner incredibly fast and easy. It also lasts all day!

8) Maybelline One by One and Maybelline The Falsie's - Mascaras I've been alternating between these two mascaras for the past month, and I like them a lot for dramatic lashes. I would re-purchase both! 

9) E.L.F Studio Conditioning Lip Balm in Peaceful Pink - I just started using this after having it for a few months. It's so moisturizing and the perfect pink for every day. It's for sure one of my favorite products from E.L.F. I just hate the darn packaging! Me + Lip Brushes = no bueno. 

10) Milani Lipstick in Rosehip - I was looking for a bright pink lipstick that is more pink than fuschia - which many bright pinks tend to lean toward, and I came across Rosehip. This is a definite must-have. I'll do a post on it soon, as you can't tell the true color from my FOTD below.. In the mean time, you can drool over Temptalia's swatch of it.

(Image Credit: Temptalia.com)

Here's a FOTD from the other day. I've pretty much been doing the same look for the past couple of weeks.

Face: 

MAC Select Moisturecover Concealer NW20 (under eyes, applied with my fingers)

Chanel Vitalumiere Aqua B30 + 1/2 pump of Guerlain Parure Extreme in #3 for added coverage (applied with Coastal Scents Bionic Buffer Brush)

Ben Nye Neutral Set Powder (under eyes to set concealer, applied with a tapered blending brush)

Guerlain Meteorites in Mythic (to set foundation, applied with a kabuki brush)

MAC Magically Cool Liquid Powder in Honey Rose (on my cheeks & bridge of my nose, applied with Sigma F50)

Physician's Formula Healthy Glow Bronzer (for added warmth and contour, applied with MAC #168 brush)

Eyes: 

MAC Rubenesque Paint Pot (all over my lids, applied with my fingers)

MAC Jardin Aires Pigment (all over my lid, on top of Rubenesque)

MAC Groundwork Paint Pot (smudged into my upper and lower lashline with a pencil brush)

MAC Quite Natural Paint Pot (smudged into my crease with a pencil brush, blending any harsh edges with my fingers)

Physician's Formula Eye Booster Eyeliner in Ultra Black (upper lashline)

Revlon Colorstay Eyeliner in Black (on my waterline)

Maybelline One by One Mascara

Brows:

MAC Eyebrow Retractable Crayon in Spiked

Anastasia Clear Brow Gel

Lips:

MAC Lipliner Pencil in Oak

E.L.F. Studio Conditioning Lip Balm in Peaceful Pink

Milani Lipstick in Rosehip (applied very sheerly)

Sally Hansen Extreme Lip Plumper (applied on top for shine)

Btw, the leopard scarf I'm wearing is from Forever 21. I purchased it last week, and I've been wearing it almost every day! Love it.